King Dubya the Doofus

The Son King, Dubya XIV, holds an audience [comments in brackets are mine]:

Trying to Maintain Control of the State, in a State of Confusion

In all, Bush uttered nearly 7,000 words in his 45-minute Q But his message could be summed up with a brief phrase in his least-favorite language: L'Etat c'est moi (I am the state).

His approval of a program to eavesdrop without warrants: "As I stand here right now [channeling Tricky Dick; see below], I can tell the American people the program is legal," he certified.

His refusal to release photos of him with Abramoff: "They're not relevant to the investigation."

His view on congressional anti-torture legislation: "Conducting war is a responsibility in the executive branch, not the legislative branch." [But we don't torture!]

His refusal to provide Congress with testimony about the federal response to Hurricane Katrina: "That's just the way it works." [Sweet Barbara Mother of Bush. This bastard really does believe he's a king.]

Midway through this Bourbonic [Is that a reference to the French dynasty, Jack Daniels, or both?] performance, the Los Angeles Times's James Gerstenzang offered an observation on Bush's surveillance policy: "This seems to sound like something President Nixon once said, which was: 'When the president does it, then that means that it's not illegal.' " Whispered "oohs" could be heard in the room. Bush gave a look indicating he wished the dangling camera had fallen on Gerstenzang.

"Most presidents believe that during a time of war that we can use our authorities [Respect mah authoritahs!] under the Constitution to make decisions necessary to protect us," he answered, then offered his reading of legislation passed after the 2001 terrorist attacks: "Go ahead and conduct the war. We're not going to tell you how to do it." [Blind, torture, kill at will! You're our preznit, so automatically everything you say and do is just, noble, and legal! Provided you don't get a BJ in the Oval Office.]

Every time our asswipe president opens his mouth, he gives the country one more reason to impeach him.

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